It's just depression. It'll go away. Really. How fast does the Maxx go again?
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As always, there's so much more to say than I seem to be posting, of late. I'm not neglecting you, diary... just living so fast that typing fails to keep up with it.

I'm about to take off to go downtown for the seizure-clinic appointment. I'm hoping to grab a fast-food-burger or something on the way, as I've not eaten yet. I'm nervous - new doctor and all. I need to take the number 8 bus, I need to get there by 2:30 for processing, I need...

...I need to be able to calm down, to get the hell out of here for a while and DO something, not just wander to an appointment and back. Flat out, I need to not be broke. I want to spend a few hours in one of the coffeeshops, writing hard copy, drinking kiwi italian soda. I want to go out to dinner with friends.

This saturday, the vampire game is being held at McMenemins, and it's expected that everyone will bring money for dinner and drinks while there. *sighs softly* I'll be going, it's an important game. I just won't be eating or drinking.

A lot of people talk about being broke, complain that they can only eat at places like Subway, or that they had to get one pair of shoes instead of two. Right now I'm counting pennies, hoping to get a soda.

If this neurologist can help, I'll have a chance at getting a job again. If he can't... *shrugs*

Depression, the afterbirth of a night's sleep on Clonazepam. Which, by the way, seems to be giving me horrendous nightmares. Gotta remember to discuss that too.

I want to be healthy. I want to have enough money to live comfortably and get treats. I want all my boys with me. I want decent internet access on a decent computer with a decent version of photoshop.

One out of four...

...isn't enough.

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