Previous - this entry written on February 25, 2006 at 5:17 pm - Next
So you're having a shitty day. I'm sorry, I honestly am. Have you not noticed me trying to show you the sympathy I feel, doing what I can to be there for you, helping you if I can?
Why would you feel the need to do something you KNOW is going to push just about every button I have, and then brush it off with 'well I'm having a bad day, I thought you'd be...' ...what was it, compassionate? Understanding? I am, of just about everything. I am NOT understanding when it comes to being roughly kissed without my permission, making it OBVIOUS that you know it's going to bother me, doing it anyway, and when my first reaction is one of stunned annoyance, you tell me to shut up and enjoy it before you do it again.
Great. Just great. Yeah, no wonder you're worried something will go wrong when talking to her, you really can manage to fuck up just about anything, can't you? I mean, you know me. You know my buttons. You know what I DON'T like. And you decided because you're busy sulking you can fucking kiss me and then shrug it off. That is not how this works. That is not how this would work if we were nothing but friends. That is not how this would work if we were lovers, or boyfriend/girlfriend, or husband and wife. This is NOT OK. Screw the D/s reasons, speaking as just plain Jax, THIS IS NOT OK.
And you knew it. Knew the moment you started typing it. Knew when you posted.
I understand that you're upset, I understand WHY you're upset, you should know better than most that I know how it feels to be in a situation like this.
I know you want someone there, someone to hold, to touch, to be near you.
And I know that you are making it signifigantly harder for me to be sympathetic, to stop myself from doing something extremely unpleasant, in short, to be supportive rather than vicious. Is it vicious you want? Is that why you're doing this?
...then you know what?
This is a game I'm GOOD at. Now where did I put that phone...
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