For now... I write.

Torian and I are still talking, and... ehh. I don't know how he feels completely but I think I'm actually understanding a LOT more, which is good. Yes, I still care about him a lot.

Tor: How can I switch submission off when I don't need it?

Lady Raven: There is no one perfect answer to that question, love. I know it is possible to switch it off, I know that for me MPD works... hrm.

Lady Raven: Just a moment.

Lady Raven: Asking Ryan, who is also a switch and who is online on AIM, to see if he has any other suggestions/methods. Also writing up the question in my journal to see if I can get any other responses. See, I only know what worked for me: splitting, having various personae in my head to pull out at appropriate times. I use that as a trigger, use it to adjust my moods when I can, and it works for me... but there's no way to be sure it would work for you.

Tor: It won't.

Tor: I am not willing to split my head.

Lady Raven: Neither is [Ryan], which is why I'm asking him for advice, to see how he copes.

...that posted... yeah. Question-and-answer time, oh loyal readers. I know some of you are into BDSM or one of the many variations of D/s, and that several of you are indeed Switches (if you aren't sure what you are, feel free to go play around with the BDSM Selector I wrote up quite a while ago. I seem to recall also writing up a definition of each term somewhere...

...anyway. How do you cope with the times when for whatever reason you can't/won't be submissive? What mental tricks, changes of outlook, triggers, whatever, do you use? How do you handle switching on a day-to-day basis?

If you'd be willing to let me know or even wander over and tell Torian yourself, it would be muchly appreciated.

Oh, if anyone's curious:

[Ryan]: you can't. I just swap between it and being dom....
[Ryan]: I'm only submissive for a very selective group of people though, so it's never been a problem for me.
[Ryan]: so I guess "cultivate a strong sense of inherent superiority to the filth calling itself humanity by which you are surrounded" works pretty well...

Heh. Yeah, he amuses me sometimes.

Tor: I don't resent humanity.

Lady Raven: *amused* You don't resent the people dragging you and your country into a war YOU didn't ask for, or the people who fucked up your hours and paychecks, or the idiots who designed a school system that makes it harder for you to learn instead of easier?

Lady Raven: You don't resent suicide bombers, or inbred rednecks, or people who type in leetspeak and ALL UPPER CASE in chatrooms?

Lady Raven: You don't resent whoever it was who decided Barbie would be a good role model for women?

Tor: Why base my day to day life on being upset with the world? Do you know how much STRESS that would cause me?

Lady Raven: *wry grin* Yes, actually... or at least, I can guess at it. Me? I think that people-in-general are idiots, and it just amuses me, not stresses me. I LIKE the belief that yes, I actually AM better than most of the artichokes out there that are masquerading as human beings.

Heh. *pads off, posting this*