I want the kitten to check email. To read. To reply. I want something from him to calm me down, keep me from simply shoving him on the next bus to Canada.

Beating him? Hurting him? Injuring the little bastard? Right now, that seems too kind. Sending him away... THAT seems better. Much better. You would not BELIEVE how much it hurts to have little bits of broken glass in your feet, your breasts, your hands, and your cunt. NOT fun.

So I'm angry. Enraged. Furious.

But outward... oh, I'm so calm right now. Smiling. Cheerful.

Anyone who knows me well would run.

Kadin can't run... or at least, he had damned well better not run. That would be the worst possible thing he could do right now. Begging Grr to protect him? Maybe. She could keep me from seriously hurting him, I think. Begging me for mercy, asking for forgiveness? Might work, if he does it well enough.

But if when I finally DO walk in that door the little bastard is all clingy and happy and such, he is SCREWED. Dead. I really, truly, completely am NOT happy.

This is NOT how I want this day to go. Not what I want from him. Not what I need.

When I do bother taking him back with me again, he will be cleaning. Bathroom and living room. Anywhere that I've found glass. It will be spotless.

And this time, if I find glass bits getting rubbed into my cunt thanks to his carelessness and thoughtlessness, he'll be LICKING up the glass shards.

I am not happy.