Fish, I'm writing because although I have a perfectly good book, a fair amount of pens, photoshop, and more... it seems as if all I start doing I'm too overheated to enjoy as much as I should and too distracted to finish it. Except writing. This is one of the few things that I can do almost any time. Words via keyboard come out easier than music, than pictures, than speech. I'm sweating slightly, debating going and hanging out in the main room. I'm not going to - not yet, at any rate. There's things I want to say.

Among them is one that I know perfectly well will make the rounds all on its own, so I might as well give my take on it before it's gotten too distorted by the people passing it on. Bri - Becca - whatever... yes, she and Ryan have officially Had Sex. *wry grin* Yes, I knew about it as it was happening - I was half-asleep in the same room, curled up under the window on a pile of clothing and pillows. Yes, I approved of it and still do. Ryan seems pretty edgy now, he's afraid he wasn't good enough, afraid he did something wrong, or that he hurt her too much, or that she'll change her mind after the fact, basically all the standard 'morning after' fears that any half-decent and intelligent male would be having in these circumstances. From what I can tell Bri's having them too, to some extent... this was her First, and (to give details none of you really need) she's unusually tight as it is, and hasn't even really masturbated before. *blinks* VERY innocent.

I can't help but be worried for both of them. No, NOT because they had sex... I think it's perfectly healthy and I'm hoping they will continue, it will do Bri good to relax and start enjoying her body and it will do Ryan good to get laid and spend more time just being with her, in every sense of that word. My worries are mostly for their intellect - the part of them that stresses and over-thinks and tries to be rational about something that should simply be dealt with, enjoyed, etc. Most of their mutual discomfort at the moment was brought on by the fact that Bri had to take off at 7:00 in the morning and Ryan wasn't all that conscious when she left, and he hasn't seen her since then. I strongly suspect that once they've had a chance to hug and snuggle and say all the wordless half-smile shy things that I know perfectly well they'll both end up saying/showing... yeah. Once they have a chance for physical contact again that should solve a lot of their upsettednesses. Which is so very not a word, but I don't care. *amused*

Caleb called at some point yesterday... I'd been playing music and thinking a bit too much and NOT taking my meds, and the end result was a Twitchy Jax who basically curled up in a little ball. Amazingly enough, not only did getting rest help, getting to hear two people enjoying each other and being half-awake for it seems to have helped too. It was surprisingly soothing, of all things. *blinks* Of all the reactions I could have had to it, that was the last one I was expecting. Ehh.

Fish, I'm going to wrap this up. It's getting close to 11:30 and although I doubt I will be sleeping any time soon I know Ryan will be trying to and that he intends to read this before he goes to bed. There's sounds of people out in the other room, and I'm going to wander out, get some more water, then come back in and snuggle for a bit.

Life is, overall, pretty good.

And for the record, I REALLY miss my boys. *sighs* It's at the point where I think of Kadin every time it rains, where Caleb comes to mind every time I see the sun, Torian slides into my thoughts when the world is dark... yeah. *wry grin* Sentimental Jax, at the moment.