First off, I WILL be back. I am walking away from the 'net to give myself space to think and process and adjust to the life choices I am making, to help myself concentrate on survival rather than emotion, and, simply put, because I'm an addict and I need to break the addiction.

I am not leaving because of anyone. If anything, there are many of you who make this walking-away incredibly hard because I will still be worrying about you, caring about you, thinking about you.

I will still keep up on the diaries of my friends, and if there is major health or life news about me, I will ask Grr, Scott, Thomas, or someone else to post it for me. I am not trying to worry any of you any more than I already do.

Someone mentioned that it seems unfair that I cut off and cut out most of the people I care about but still talk, for example, with Vicki. A few facts: Vicki and her household is here IRL. She is someone it would be difficult to avoid even if I wanted to, which I do not. My health is as always a fragile thing, and sometimes I need the Grr's support and care.

My boys... my pets... my slaves...

...no.

I'm not asking you to wait for me. I'm not expecting you to wait for me. I know that I have little enough patience on my own account.

For right now, I am concentrating on the physical reality of day-to-day life, and on Caleb.

You all knew the score. You all knew that if it came down to me needing time and space to think, that Caleb is the alpha. I'm sorry that this hurts so many people.

It IS, for me, the right decision.

I am an addict, and I am getting my last fix in now: sign the guestbook. Ask anything. ANYTHING. This week, I will stay around enough to answer. I'll try to explain anything that confuses.

And now, I need to go.

Bye.