He says that he knows what he's stopped giving me. What it is that has sent me into other arms. Drama... *chuckles softly* My bard, I love you because you know me.

It is, in a way. I need a certain amount of drama. I... hm. Perhaps need isn't the word. I'm sure I could survive without it. But I want it, I enjoy it, I savor it and I wouldn't be content without it.

I want my daily dose of soap-opera. Life just isn't the same if there isn't a bit of tears-and-laughter mixed in with everyday greyness.

I'm having a mood swing, I'm sure you're quite shocked... Caleb is upstairs with the rest of the Buffy Crowd and I want him down here, I want him to run the errands that I can't do without falling over and feeling sick to my stomach, I want him to hug me and tell me everything is ok. Of all my boys, he is the only one who is HERE, who could be close enough to touch... so why is he so far away? *sighs*

Yes... I could go upstairs. Go deal with the crowd, listen to them talking and follow one word out of every five, feel horrible and wanting to run away, and be near him.

Or I could stay here, where I feel safe, where I can talk with Dai and Nick and my friends online, where Caleb could be... if he wanted to...

...have I mentioned I am very silly?