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Previous - this entry written on February 18, 2002 at 6:51 pm - Next I have a few Marlboro cigarettes in a box sprawled on the mousepad no lighter no flame, ignition lacking motor dead and the battery is gone long talks with my father we both talk loudly laugh smile nothing said there is nothing between us except this ungodly silence we both try to shatter my stomach aches arms wrapped around myself cradling the hurt trying to rock it away you can't rock a dead baby you can't fix what's gone wrong all I know is that the lines on my skin have faded too much now I need to reopen the communcation channels lines my existance is a broken thread dyed - dying - glorious hues stained-glass poetry fractured sentances words shattered into dust the steel threads I clung to are rusted now cables stretched thin until all I see is this fragile spiderweb of hope and loss and unsmoked cigarettes I hate my life today.
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