I'd wanted to have The Talk with Spikeboy... you know, the talk. The one I've been intending to have. No, I'm not going to just write it all down for the world to read, I still have SOME pride, thank you. *wry grin* I'd offered to meet him at I Love Sushi, which is an excellent sushi joint all of five minutes from Grr's place; or the Koji, another sushi joint, which is the one I went to with Kenji that first time. I was going to treat 'im and me both to a snack of a few pieces each, some tea, maybe some gyoza to go down with it, and have The Talk then... after which, we'd come back to Grr's place if he wanted, or he could get dropped off at the bus and I'd come back to Grr's. She even said she'd pick me/us up.

But apparently he spent most of today drunk off his ass, didn't sleep because he spent most of last night drunk off his ass too, and at the moment I don't know if he is awake, asleep, throwing up, feeling great, or whatever. Part of me is glad, because I know right now he needs to relax and get a chance to enjoy himself, and getting drunk can do that if it's done right. Part of me is depressed purely because I miss him. And most of me is, somehow... offended.

*does indeed have the good sense to look suitably sheepish*

I know, it's ridiculous to feel offended. It's not like he did this on purpose... I mean, sure, I know he knew today was the day of my Procedure. I know he knew I wanted to have a fairly serious conversation with him ASAP. I know he knew that Grr was driving me to and from said Procedure, and likely taking me back to her place (a 10-minute AT MOST drive from him). I know he knew all that... but it IS silly to expect that he would put one and one and one together and get sushi. Or even get the possibility that I might want his company today.

Under the circumstances, it's kind of insulting that he didn't even consider that I would want his company, today of all days. I mean, REALLY. And I know too that even if he reads this, it's likely he will just shake his head, being all confused, and innocent, and wondering aloud how I can have so many foolish, freakish, frivolous, and female emotional issues over such an unimportant thing.

See, that is becoming part of what The Talk is going to be about, now. He's got this habit wherein he seems to assume that anything he is not urgently interested in himself right then is unimportant. He spaces out, puts off, ignores, denies, delays, shrugs off, hides from, avoids, and otherwise manages to not get tangled in various things that are incredibly important to the rest of us.

Cases in point? Simple examples? I'm not going to hand out details, exactly, but: Grr's brother's wake. Me, after the termination. Those three simple words. A few not-so-simple but VERY serious-to-me buttons that keep getting pressed, and just as many that keep NOT being pressed when I need 'em to be.

So. At least in theory, I am going to get my bitching about all that out of the way during The Talk. Which will kind of change the mood of it somewhat, but well, he got to get drunk while I was getting poked and scraped out and hurt a lot. I think it's fair.

Yaoi! Courtesy of darling MeLLoN, who has a deadjournal and is not updating her diaryland diary any more, I am now thinking muchly about yaoi instead of about being upset at men. I'm almost sure this is a good thing...