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What Once Was
Sometimes looking backward can be just as useful as looking up...


September 30, 2001
...and she said: All About The Jax

September 30, 2001
...and she said: Almost Depressed... Almost

September 30, 2001
...and she said: An Image Of Him

September 30, 2001
...and she said: An Unsent Letter

September 29, 2001
...and she said: Lunatics And Fools Are We

September 29, 2001
...and she said: Not All Who Wander...

September 29, 2001
...and she said: What Will I Regret?

September 29, 2001
...and she said: For The Wench

September 28, 2001
...and she said: Introducing Me

September 28, 2001
...and she said: Gothie And The Brain

September 27, 2001
...and she said: On The Rag

September 27, 2001
...and she said: Meet Virginia

September 26, 2001
...and she said: This Is Not Useful

September 29, 2001
...and she said: In Which our Hero Finds A Silver Lining

September 25, 2001
...and she said: Reaching For The Bed

September 24, 2001
...and she said: Going Up...

September 24, 2001
...and she said: Lyrics And More Bad Mood

September 24, 2001
...and she said: Depression, Wheee!

September 24, 2001
...and she said: In Which our Hero Plays With Names

September 23, 2001
...and she said: I Am Me, Need I Say More?

Saturday.. erm...
...and she said: Web TV Is Evil

September 21, 2001
...and she said: Almost Regretful

September 24, 2001
...and she said: Too Easily Depressed

September 21, 2001
...and she said: Interrupting Mouse

September 21, 2001
...and she said: Lyrics Again, This Time From Sarah

September 21, 2001
...and she said: Empty Hobbit-Hole

September 20, 2001
...and she said: Bored Further, How Interesting

September 20, 2001
...and she said: Boredom And Uselessness

September 20, 2001
...and she said: A Few Stolen (and wasted) Minutes

September 20, 2001
...and she said: Jonesing For Electronic Connection

September 19, 2001
...and she said: Hugs To The Universe

September 19, 2001
...and she said: Ice Cream...

September 18, 2001
...and she said: An Up, For The Moment

September 17, 2001
...and she said: Graphics Woes And Rejoicings

September 18, 2001
...and she said: An Update, Really Truly

September 17, 2001
...and she said: Still Alive, Mostly

September 16, 2001
...and she said: Long, And Not Worth It

September 16, 2001
...and she said: Alexander's Day

September 15, 2001
...and she said: MUCH Better

September 15, 2001
...and she said: Spoon In The Road

September 15, 2001
...and she said: Frustration, Furcadia Style

September 15, 2001
...and she said: Not In My Lifetime

September 14, 2001
...and she said: Because I Get Nervous

September 14, 2001
...and she said: Happy Birthday

September 13, 2001
...and she said: I Need To Stop This

September 13, 2001
...and she said: More Superstition

September 13, 2001
...and she said: Getting My Hopes Up

September 13, 2001
...and she said: Winamp, My Favorite Psychologist

September 13, 2001
...and she said: Penguins

September 12, 2001
...and she said: Does It Have To Hurt This Much Every Time He Leaves?

September 11, 2001
...and she said: Alanis, I'm Not

September 11, 2001
...and she said: Ending The World

September 11, 2001
...and she said: President Speech What Huh?

September 11, 2001
...and she said: Upside Down

September 11, 2001
...and she said: Chicken Who?

September 11, 2001
...and she said: Devil Mouse, 'an It's Not Me

September 11, 2001
...and she said: Retreat Into Poetical Madness

September 10, 2001
...and she said: Pouting Muchly, Again

September 10, 2001
...and she said: Warning, Warning

September 10, 2001
...and she said: My Dreams Are Gone

September 10, 2001
...and she said: Tired, Yes Again

September 12, 2001
...and she said: Need I Say More?

September 09, 2001
...and she said: Cold Breeze Beckons...

September 08, 2001
...and she said: Red Cheeks And Embarassment

September 08, 2001
...and she said: Waking Up To Ice Cream

September 07, 2001
...and she said: Here. Go Away Now. I'm Busy Being An Idiot.

September 07, 2001
...and she said: Universal Reversal

September 07, 2001
...and she said: Speech, Regretted

September 12, 2001
...and she said: Halcyon And On And On

September 12, 2001
...and she said: Life Goes On... And On... And On...

September 07, 2001
...and she said: Advancing Paralysis

September 07, 2001
...and she said: Fading Fast And Falling Free

September 06, 2001
...and she said: Nomenclature

September 06, 2001
...and she said: Why I Should Be Sober

September 06, 2001
...and she said: Falling Behind

September 05, 2001
...and she said: My Life Is Boring

September 05, 2001
...and she said: Daydreaming Fool

September 05, 2001
...and she said: What I'm Doing And Why

September 05, 2001
...and she said: Paranoia, Anyone?

September 04, 2001
...and she said: Evil Electronic Thing

September 04, 2001
...and she said: Proposal

September 03, 2001
...and she said: Mealtime Musings

September 03, 2001
...and she said: Feeling Grr-ish And Sleepy

September 03, 2001
...and she said: So What Am I Doing Now? Zilch.

September 03, 2001
...and she said: No Sleep = No Brain

September 03, 2001
...and she said: Just Me, Being Strange Again

September 02, 2001
...and she said: Incoherent, The Man Himself

September 02, 2001
...and she said: In Which our Hero Gets Very Drunk

September 02, 2001
...and she said: One Tequila, Two Tequila, Three Tequila...

September 02, 2001
...and she said: In Which our Hero Rediscovers Misery

September 02, 2001
...and she said: From Disaster To Apathy

September 02, 2001
...and she said: Just Because I'm Paranoid...

September 02, 2001
...and she said: Finding Myself Again

September 14, 2001
...and she said: Inhale, Exhale, Panic

September 14, 2001
...and she said: Bad Grr

September 01, 2001
...and she said: Life

September 01, 2001
...and she said: My Boy

September 01, 2001
...and she said: Irina

September 07, 2001
...and she said: Dictionary Of Jax

September 07, 2001
...and she said: Quick And Dirty

September 09, 2001
...and she said: Dope Me Up And Let Me Ride

September 09, 2001
...and she said: I Have But One Small Tongue...

September 09, 2001
...and she said: Another Bad Poem, Sorry

September 09, 2001
...and she said: List Me, Baby!

September 09, 2001
...and she said: Still Not Sober, Hurrah!

September 09, 2001
...and she said: Why I Look Green

September 04, 2001
...and she said: Whimpering Lots

September 23, 2001
...and she said: ...Doesn't Mean They Aren't Out To Get Me

September 17, 2001
...and she said: I Repeat, We Have Normalicy...

September 17, 2001
...and she said: Cynicism Comes Later, Today There Are Roses



------ 2001 -

March, and All Things Therein
April, Illness and Hopes
May, Sick to My Soul
June, Preparation and Reparation
July, Freedom and Lack Thereof
August, and The Loss Of Me
September, Low Blood Sugar and High Self Esteem
October, Struggling With Submission
November, Holidays and Kidney Stones
December, A Transition of Sorts


------ 2002 -

January, California Dreaming
February, Boys and Girls and Me
March, Jax On The Titanic
April, Things CAN Get Worse
May, Dyverwho?
June, In Which OHP Seems To Win
July, The Month Of The Tygrrr
August, Fragmentation And Fear
September, A Recovering Girl
October, Flaws Become Obvious
November, When Things Fall Apart
December, Discovering A Norse Tiger
(or When Holidays Attack)



------ 2003 -

January, Moving And Madness
February, Beaverton Blues
March, (Y'know, this one just doesn't stand out in any useful title-ish way, so I'm just going to blather here for a ridiculous amount of space because I can. Hey, that would make a great title!) Because I Can
April, Someone Is Playing Whack-A-Mole With My Brain
May, Already Too Much Heat
June, Rediscovering An Old Friend
July, Summer Storms
August, In Which I Am Pathetic
September, Preparing For Holiday Season
October, No Pie For Jax
November, And All Things Offline
December, The Big Snow


------ 2004 -

January, As We Turn Over A New Leaf
February, The Dance Of... What, Again?
March, Oppression In The Oddest Places
April, In Which We Are Very Forgetful
May, Last Straws And Long Meaningful Glances
June, California Ho!


------ Here There Be Dragons -

From here, I got lazy; the time in California blurred into one long, strange dream and I only awoke recently. I'm going to condense it into years, or segments, or something; months are no longer clearly defined.

California And The Heat



Wanna get those odd rambling emails that pass for communication with me at times? Wanna know when I do a major update? Wanna be a member of, as a friend so nicely put it, the Jax Fan Club or whatever the hell it is? Then join the bloody list, dammit!

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