But I'm alone here, I'm bored, I'm scared, and frankly, all my friends live online, or at least show up here often enough that this is a good place to look for 'em.

I go in on Monday so they can shove a camera-in-a-tube up in places I don't want to think about.

They think I may have somebody-or-other's Disease, at least two different somebody-or-others got mentioned and goddess only knows how many more are waiting in the wings.

So I'm online tonight, eating my 'last meal' as it were, since I'm not allowed any solid food tomorrow. I'm supposed to give m'self an enema but they HURT and they SCARE ME and I'm broke again, so no. Fuckem. If it's that important, they can damned well give me one in the hospital, and lace it with painkillers.

*shrugs*

No, I'm not very optimistic.

Anyway, yeah. I'm not all the way back, because my life is not all the way fixed. But some friends I am not prepared to abandon - if you call me, if you need me, I'll try my best always to be there. That's the promise I made to my boys, and I am DAMNED well going to keep it. *sighs*

Amusing, all things considered.

And yes, boy, forgiveness is good, returning to me is good... you were in my dreams last night. I dreamed you'd erased the mark again. That you laughed when you did it because, as you said through your laughter, you could always sweet-talk your way back, that I was a sucker for pretty words.

Am I?