It's Shameful...
Previous - this entry written on October 25, 2001 at 12:27 pm - Next


It's shameful to discover that because I am sick, because this term my classes were cancelled, in short, because of things beyond my control, I am apparently worthless, the scum of the earth, in the eyes of the very people who hold my fate and my health in their fake-fingernailed, dirty, grubby little hands.

Yes, I'm just a tad bit bitter right now.

I have been fighting the health care system here in Oregon for almost a month now, and have yet to make much progress... now they tell me it will be over a week until I can even see a doctor, and that it will only be a screening appointment. I might have to wait another month before I can get a real appointment.

I have recurring kidney stones... occasional bladder infections... and the hypoglycemia.

At this rate, I'll be dead and buried before they agree to treat me. *sighs*

Yes, ok, that was a bit over the top... but really, it feels as if one has to be healthy, working, and perfect in order to get the care and medical support that you only need if you are sick, NOT working, and imperfect. I used to think I understood the health care system here, that I knew how it worked, what hoops I needed to jump through... that I understood my 'place in society', if you will. And now all that's been tossed out. Now I end up feeling as if I would really be better off dead... the scornful looks, the insults... and the outright lies, my GOD...

...I have gone in to talk to people in the health care office a good six times now. Not ONCE have they given me the same story. Every time it's different. New hoops. New rules. New schedules. Someone else I have to talk to, some new form that I should have filled out in triplicate but that no one had MENTIONED until now... and then when I bring in that form I'm told that no, I didn't need THAT one, I need this NEW one... *sighs*

I am very frustrated... and very embarassed... when did being sick turn you into something so socially unacceptable?

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