1) There's something there... *giggles* is this a cock?

2) Noooo...

1) What is it then? And if you tell me it's a shoelace I'm gonna hurt you.

2) It's a... pen.

1) *perky voice* Really? Can I write with it?

*sounds of writing attempt interspersed with...*

2) It's a... hocky puck- NO! WAIT!

1) *laughing*

2) It's a very delicate and expensive scientific instrument.

1) Wow. What does it measure?

2) *calmly* About nine inches.

- just a note... that measurement is not exaggeration. *happy Jax*