No, actually what I need to do is stop being so freakin' scared and just CALL him. It's not like he's going to kill me, right? And I DO owe him time... but... argh.

Don't want to be the sweet Astra he knows.

Want to be bitchgirl.

I have a lot to say and hopefully I'll get it out in writing at some point tonight, but for now, I'm gonna get a nap instead.

I lurk on the messagethingies... I don't want to talk, I don't want to have to worry any more than I already am. I don't say much, right now.

See, there's this... thing... that I kind of have to think about right now. Takes concentration.

I wish I could stop hinting about all this and just SAY it... why is it so hard to just say?

Screw it. Nap. That's safe.

I'll go take my nice safe nap and wait for it to be tomorrow.

Please, no more dreams of Her. I'm tired of them.

I'd rather be dreaming about him... or him... or him... or her... or them... *snickers* ...pronoun trouble?

I feel like I'm lost in a long-dead science fiction novel. I just want to stop being dramatic and well-written and go home.