Cold, Broken... But Still Here
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Blather... 's kinda cool.
*soft smile*Soon. There's a song that we used to sing way back when I still went to church-camp in the summer... it was one of the songs that got sung around the campfire before we all turned in, or whatever was passing for a campfire that day. The lyrics are pretty simple. soon and very soon we are going to see the king soon and very soon we are going to see the king soon and very soon we are going to see the king hallelujah, hallelujah we are going to see the king Add to that the sound of Rufus Wainwright tearing all the half-healed fragments of my soul with another set of words and music. your faith was strong, but you needed proof you saw her bathing on the roof her beauty in the moonlight overthrew you she tied you to a kitchen chair she broke your throne, she cut your hair and from your lips, she drew the hallelujah hallelujah, hallelujah hallelujah, hallelujah maybe i have been here before i know this room, ive walked this floor i used to live alone before i knew ya ive seen your flag on the marble arch love is not a victory march its a cold and its a broken hallelujah Angst-girl songs and the fading stain of ink on my body, wounds that won't heal, not ever... physically I'm getting better. I'm WAY over the weight I want to be right now but since part of that was due, they think, to the malfunctions that should clear out with this surgery I'll be able to lose a good chunk of it. My kitten will be arriving soon and I've just gotten to spend several days with my Caleb. My Tiger is here, I'm safe, ok... ...but... Why? Why the ache? Heh... sometimes, doing something as prosaic as cooking or cleaning can actually drag me out of this kind of mood. Not working today... I... ...I'm alive. I will keep going. It really hurts.
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