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Previous - this entry written on February 05, 2002 at 2:07 pm - Next *sighs softly* Don't go away... ...it's worse not seeing. Not knowing. At least if you're there I can reassure myself that you're as ok as it gets right now. I can be somewhat sure that you know I am here, that if something were to happen, if you needed me, you could find me. I'd know you were there. Can't stand not knowing. Hate it. *sighs again* I'll talk, if you want. Just don't go, not for that reason. It hurts me to see you, yes. It hurts far more NOT to see you. ... ... ... ...this isn't related to what I'm thinking now. It's a story fragment I wrote up earlier when I was bored. Just want to post it and forget it. The Playlist: Phil Collins - In The Air Tonight NIN - Hurt Rufus Wainwright - Hallelujah Radiohead - Talk Show Host NIN - Something I Can Never Have Meredith Brooks - Watched You Fall Heather Alexander - Wolfen One Craig Armstron - This Love Don't speak, little one. Don't say anything once we are inside. Be silent. I love you. Beautiful boy standing in a faded t-shirt, ragged pants, throw-away clothing. She'd told him to wear clothes he didn't care about. He knew what she meant, knew also that after today they would be nothing but rags. It wouldn't be the first outfit he'd lost that way. Girl, now-fading red hair, black leggings, black shirt, black boots, almost a goth but the sparkle in her eyes and the sandals she wore shoved her into the misfit category instead. Bedroom. Bed big enough for three, they'd proved that repeatedly. Cage big enough for two, but usually occupied by one. And chains. He was startled at how many chains she'd found. They were attached to the bed, to the cage, to two new hooks mounted in the wall, one in the ceiling, the place looked like a dungeon instead of the bedroom he'd expected. Dusty red sheets, the color of dried blood. That didn't surprise him. A knife. No clothing on the boy, now. Rags and scraps at his feet, at hers. And the bed,waiting. The cage had been moved back and away, the hanging light taken down. He knelt, trusting eyes, body trembling slightly in the cool air. Bed. Now. Beautiful boy lying face-down, arms spread and raised, chains and cuffs slowly fastened about his body. One after another, until his arms, his legs, even his throat, were no longer his own but extentions of the bed, of the chains, of her will. Bound. He tried to move - couldn't. Tried to turn over - couldn't. He shivered and managed with a bit of effort to turn his head enough to see her. She smiles. Sits beside him. Her hand is warm on bare skin, he arches up as best he can, wanting more. You can speak now... but only three things. No other words. You can beg to be whipped. You can ask to be beaten harder. And you can tell me you love me. Hand raised when he starts to speak. Shake of the head. It's the closest thing to a safeword I will allow you this time, little one. This time, for once, my love WILL protect you. Tell me you love me... and I may no stop immediately, but I WILL stop. A puzzled look from the boy, wide eyes, tangled hair, pressing himself down now until his mind accepts this order and begins to understand it. When his eyes are bright with knowledge she nods. Strokes his hair. Speaks. I know you love me, pet. That's not in doubt. I'm just going to enjoy beating those beautiful words out of you, for once. It will be amusing watching you struggle NOT to say them. She smiles again. Stands. Moves to the computer and starts the music playing faintly, background only, but he knows these songs and the look of shock is enough to make her smile a third time. Gentle songs, sad songs, love and comfort and whenever he played these, she would hold him and nuzzle him and promise him the world. They meant safety, despite the pain. They meant comfort, despite the hurt they brought to mind. He whimpered softly and buried his face in the sheets. Behind him there was the sound of footsteps, and then silence. She didn't move again until he begged. Hosted by Diaryland - All Rights Reserved - Image, Layout, and Content copyright Jax Raven - - Do Not Feed The Moose - |
