As if it's about a conscious choice

As if,

In the moment that I would go,

I am thinking about anything

Other than leaving

He says "Don't leave me"

As if I have faith

That he would stay

As if,

Without any real reason for me

To trust and believe

Somehow

I still know he will be there

When I come back

He says "Don't leave me"

But keeps it to himself

Unsent

Unspoken

The words I want to hear

Buried behind shyness or fear

As if he knows

Or thinks he knows

That the words are not

For listening

Or speaking

But for holding until

I am already gone