Bang.

And Kadin's collar, the beautiful beaded necklace that he wears in place of an actual collar when he's in public... broke.

Snapped.

He's not even certain he found all the beads from it.

*sighs softly*

It's funny how much such a little thing can mean... that one necklace represented so much. Meant so much. Hearing that it's gone... it hurts. I know he didn't do it on purpose, and I know he's frightened that it means he IS uncollared... I want to reassure him.

I want to make it all ok.

This is VERY hard to do, when inside I want to curl up and just sob for a moment... I miss him so much, and hearing this, having it happen when I can't be there, when I can't see his eyes, hear his voice, it's going to drive me insane. It hurts me.

It hurts so much, missing him... gods... I want my boy! More than ever right now, I want my boy. I want to curl around him, nuzzle him, I want to watch his face light up when my fingers move over his throat. I want to find something, even just a strand of thread or a bit of ribbon, to wrap around... and then tell him that it doesn't matter, that no matter what he has there physically, I know he loves me and I know he's mine.

I want it to all be ok.

I want him here.

Why the HELL does this hurt so much?