I was going to write about that.

And then I passed out twice in the shower.

This is one of those days when I really honestly wonder if it's worth still trying.

See, I feel... almost as if I'm cheating my boys. Why? Because I know, even if I won't often talk about it or anything, that I don't have much longer. Days like this remind me of that. I've a very limited time. Is it any wonder I want so badly to fit as much into it as possible? Is it any real surprise that I want to have some visible, viable effect on the world NOW?

I'm feeling terrified. My hands are shaking, not just from the symptoms but from fear, too. It's very, very harsh.

This is very much an "I don't want to talk about it" entry.