I'm not going to go into the times when I feel proud of myself, of who I am or what I do. Not talking about taking pride in me.

No, today my pride is found in someone else, a boy whose words are honest and intense, pulled straight from his heart onto the page. I take pride in him because he is mine... I am proud of him because I know that he has the mind and heart and will and spirit to accomplish incredible things, to change his world.

He's hurt me sometimes. Frustrated me often. Infuriated me once in a rare while.

He's amused me, made me smile, made me laugh, made me glad to be alive and talking with him. He's brought joy and pleasure and newfound hope to my life.

No. He's not the only one who has ever done so... not by a long shot. Most of those I've owned have brought such pleasure to me. And yes, some of those who have owned me have also left me proud, sometimes even in a similar sense.

But right now, of all those I lay claim to and all those I care about and all those I deal with... right now, he has earned my pride, more so than any of them. Right now, he stands above the rest.

And although I AM proud of him, in a way I'm saddened... because I remember times when some of my boys would have done anything rather than let a newcomer show them up. *wry grin*

I remember too when there were enough people striving for the place he has that his efforts, while pleasing, might have been matched... MIGHT.

Only might. Only maybe. Because honestly, he has done incredibly well in many ways. And I'm proud.

Combination reminiscence and congratulations and... ...yeah... ...and stuff. I wanted to let him know that I'm proud.

*sudden grin* No... I'm not giving a name, nor a link, because the thing he did which made me proud, I'll let him decide if he wants to link to it or not, and as for a name...

...well, if he HAD one...

*smiles softly* 's funny - to me anyway - watching him learn. It feels so familiar. So right.

I've given my lecture on names before, damned if I'm going to dig through the older entries, you can go look for yourself if you're interested. The short version: names, for someone who is owned, are things to be treasured. They are given when they are earned or needed, not a right, not a constant thing. They mean something. They define the person who is named. They matter.

Names... collars... marks... speech patterns and posture, behavior, all of it... it feels so comfortable on this side of it.

Which makes me wonder why it is that lately I've been once again craving the other side of the coin... maybe because this side isn't going QUITE far enough, fast enough, rough enough, for me?

Extreme sports, XXX style.