VERY Odd Day, With Fish
Previous - this entry written on December 27, 2002 at 6:44 pm - Next

Well. This has been one hell of a fucked-up day already, and it's not even 7:00.

We'd - meaning Caleb, Grr, Ryan, and I - we'd planned to do sushi this evening. Deb, meanwhile, decided to go see a lady named Barb and take us all out for Chinese on the way.

Then Barb wasn't home, but she still wanted chinese, so instead of postponing sushi until tomorrow we were going to do it later this evening.

Except now Ryan's got a flick to go see with one of his exes and he won't get out until 10:30.

And Cal and I are out in Gresham, Ryan and Grr and the sushi place are in Beaverton.

I've got gifts for Jamie-household and something for Grr and Ryan and Joe and dammit, this has been a VERY un-organized day.

I woke up thinking I knew exactly how it would go. But then Tom cancelled, and Deb changed plans after getting home late, and Ryan's got other plans, and... yeah.

Just a BIT stressed.

...I guess I'll die another day...

I really would like a nice, simple, well-organized life for a week or two. Which would mean kidnapping someone else's, as mine is certainly never gonna get to that state. *wry grin*

So now I'm sitting here online, with Grr off doing gods-know-what, talking with Ryan, while Caleb is half-conscious on the couch trying to avoid another migrane, hoping to figure out what the heck we're actually doing tonight. This is just NUTS.

Yeah, I'm feeling bitchy. I've been looking forward to this for what, a good three weeks now? Planning and waiting and poinging and eager... and suddenly, the whole thing falls apart not once, not twice, but THREE TIMES RUNNING!

This is ridiculous, it is. There's got to be some way to make this work... and if there's not, then ya know what? I may end up trying Caleb's trick of disappearing from EVERYWHERE for a while. Go live in the hills, or find some relatives in a different state, or something. Hide.


I want my nice evening with the people in Portland I care most about. I want it TODAY, when they at least WERE all available. I want it to be us, sushi, a bottle of good plum wine, nowhere to go for a few hours, no rush, no weirdness, nothing but good company and good food and... yeah.

I want.

I've mentioned before that I'm greedy, right? Good. 'Cause I am. A lot. I want what I want, particularly when dammit, it's been ok'ed and ready-to-go for WEEKS.

I hate and despise having promised treats yanked away at the last minute... then finding some way to make it work and having them yanked away again... then finding some way to make it work a THIRD TIME and having it look like they're still about to disappear.

On the other paw, I'm a bitch.

And 'm GOOD at it.

And 'm tempted to go full-out bitch and JUST GET WHAT THE FUCK I WANT.

*sighs, curling up into a little ball... and rolling around the room, suddenly turning blue, and growing a spare set of arms in the process*


Lilo and Stitch rock my world. *grin*

There. Now, instead of "Glory Box" I'm listening to "We Only Come Out At Night", which is suitably cheerful and poing-ish. *is trying very hard to cheer up an' be a good girl and generally get along and cope with whatever happens, no matter how it goes* I don't want to make other people unhappy - not talking BDSM here, but just normal day-to-day life, thank you - and I don't want ME to be unhappy... and sometimes, I can't be happy and have everyone else happy at the same time. 'S frustrating.

...we only come out at night / the days are much too bright / we only come out at night...

*sudden soft smile*

...the world works out.

Darude is amazing, incidentally... and I just got an email from "". *blinktwitch*

This is a VERY odd day.

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